A while ago, I found this incredible article about «Things you should stop doing to yourself» and I loved it. I found it very inspiring and I read it over and over again. I realized that I had to stop doing to myself many negative things and start embracing the positive instead.
Since the author received such amazing feedback he continued the second part called «Things to start doing for yourself». Now every time I’m feeling a little down I read both of them again.
Here is what got my attention and what I learned from the author:
1) Stop spending time with the wrong people and start spending time with the people you love.
There I was everyday surrounded with «friends» I didn’t like. Even begging for some of their attention. Wasting my time and my energy having empty conversations and forcing fake smiles. Life is indeed to short to be spending it with negative people. I left some calls unanswered, pending invitations and learned eventually to say no. Maybe I am left with a micro circle of friends but we do have fun and love to be with each other!
2) Stop lying to yourself and be honest.
Not long ago I lost all inspiration. I was feeling frustrated, trapped and very unhappy. Somehow I managed to lie to myself each day with the same old line «everything is fine». Deep inside I knew I was lying and that if I didn’t get real I would grow old into this bitter and unhappy person. I made a list of the things that made me unhappy and how I could change them. Then I made another list of the things that did make me happy (we do know how much I love making lists) and started doing a little more of those things.
3) Stop being jealous of others and start cheering for other people’s victories.
The grass next door is always greener. That itsy-bitsy jealousy pang when someone achieves or has something you want has to stop. Push the envy away and cheer for them. I used to always look at others and wish I had what they had. I felt sad and always asked myself «why not me?». Now I analyze my life and I’m thankful for what I have. Maybe I don’t have everything but I do have some things that make my life pretty amazing.
4) Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others and listen to your inner voice.
I used to explain myself to EVERYONE. It was like I needed approval for everything. It was time-consuming, exhausting and frustrating. I stopped doing that. Sometimes NO is just the answer sans the explanation. Be who you are and love every minute of it.
5) Stop blaming others for your troubles and take responsibility for your actions.
It’s my mom’s fault, my boyfriend is the one responsible, I would do this/that if it wasn’t for my dad. Blah, blah, blah. How many times have we found ourselves blaming others for the things WE do wrong? I’ll tell you why: it is easier that way. Stop taking the shortcut and take responsability for your actions. I was the first to blame others for my troubles. Guess what? I was the ONLY one to blame.
6) Stop being ungrateful and start counting your blessings.
I always wanted something more than what I had. There was always something missing. I was becoming this superficial, ungrateful person. I started to count my blessings. One by one. I noticed what I had and paid less attention to what I was missing. I wrote them down to make them more real. There is a quote that says «Some people are so poor all they have is money». You are more blessed than you think and there is always someone out there that has it worse than you. Be thankful, I promise you it is life-changing.