You shoot me down but I won’t fall, I am titanium

There we go, same old story: he said, she said, you said, they said… blah, blah, blah.

Do we feel powerful when we badmouth someone? Talk behind their back? Do we feel stronger or even superior when we decide it’s a good idea to start talking vicious things of one another?

I say «we» because I include myself in that group. I try not to, but sometimes I find myself saying a couple of ironical stuff about others. Stuff that if the person was right there in front of me, would be definitely hurt.

I don’t like it and I will change it. At least I will try.

We are not born this way. I refuse to believe we come to this world already prepared to criticize and turn down people and say mean things. We learn to do so. We don’t only become mean to others but eventually we become out greatest bully.

We poke and insult ourselves. You don’t have to verbally say «I am an idiot» to yourself, but it is the same thing when you don’t respect yourself enough to walk away of a situation or person.

I try to avoid people who bring conflict into my life. I live and let others live too. I do not intentionally hurt someone or bring someone down. I just have more important things to do. You see, when you have a life, other people who don’t, will want to disturb that and interrupt that. They will obsess and they will try to take that happiness away from you. You go ahead and continue whatever you are doing that makes you happy (and awesome).

You go ahead…they will try to shoot you down but you won’t fall.

You are titanium.

 

If you can’t say something nice…

 

Everybody has the right to have an opinion.

I loved this bit of this classic Disney movie because it speaks some truth. You can have your opinion too. But there is a fine line between having one and criticizing someone with the double intention of hurting them.

Next time you find yourself gossiping about someone else’s life, think about for a second if it is really necessary to do so.

Keep the offensive comments to yourself.

There is no need to tell someone how ugly their dress is or how spoiled their kids are. No need to call anybody «fat» or «ugly» or even use the word «fag» or «retarded». Don’t be offensive and don’t be stupid.

When you badmouth someone else, it actually says more about you than the person you are talking about.

Let’s embrace being a little different

Let’s talk about criticism.

When I was a little girl I remember being bullied. Yes, I do remember it. I arrived in Venezuela when I was eight years old. I was the «new girl» who could not speak spanish and when I did, I had a «mamma mia» accent. I was from a different country and culture. My friends didn’t understand my liberal parents and they surely never processed the idea of going topless to the Greek beaches. When I spoke to my mom in Greek they made fun of the «funny» words we used.

My dad got very sick when I was thirteen. My classmates made fun of him. They said terrible things at school. That hurt so much more than hearing negative comments about myself. Why on earth should you make fun of someone who is sick? They also picked on my sister and my mom.

They called me fat because I had a big booty (oh dear, you have no idea how much I appreciate that asset now). Some teachers and fellow students thought that I was stupid because I was terrible at math but then again I was the first one to raise my hand when the teacher asked «do you know what a pentagon is?». I had no idea what it was but I told them that it came from the Greek word meaning «pente» that means «five» and «gonia» that means «angle», so my logic told me that it must be something with five angles (yeah, so stupid).

I made terrible and embarrassing spelling mistakes. But hey…I guess that is the only negative thing about speaking 4 different languages at the age of ten.

Why am I telling you this? Because I hate the fact that so many people enjoy bringing others down. The reasons for that are endless, but I would like you to know that they can only hurt you if you let them.

Yes, I was constantly bullied and it did get to me but that all stopped when I turned thirteen. It didn’t hurt me no more because I knew whoever was behind that bully was so empty, that he or she had to empty someone else with their negative criticism. I embrace positive criticism. That is my way of getting better at whatever it is that I am doing.

When I started promoting my music I received all types of comments. Some of them did hurt and some of them made me feel so loved that I couldn’t believe it.  I understood that not everybody could like me and that was ok. I like me. I believe in me and I think that is a good start point. 

I have learned to love myself. It has been a terrible battle with so many voices in autopilot inside my head but I did manage to make peace with myself. You don’t realize it, but sometimes WE are our biggest bully.

People are going to have their opinion and that is ok too. They are going to judge whatever it is that you are doing. Good or bad, right or wrong. So go ahead and ignore those comments. They are not worth it. You know exactly who you are. Negative comments are just a way of improving yourself. You are simply spectacular just the way you are. Yes, you heard me. SPECTACULAR. 

Someone once told me «whatever rocks you find in your path put them inside a bag because at the end of the road, you could build a house with them». Well I have built a big solid building with a big parking lot, thank you very much.